Jamming With Edward
Session 9 : Jamming with Edward Cast (in order of appearance): MPU, Edward Wong Hau Pepelu Tivrusky IV, Jet Black, Faye Valentine, Tom Wiles, Yuuri Kellerman, Ein, Spike Spiegel, Punch and Judy. Plot A satellites' Artificial Intelligence laments about being alone then connects to several other satellites in the area orbiting planet Earth and begins to fire lasers onto the planet’s surface, imprinting carvings in the shapes of various animals. Edward lays outside in District 39 while listening to the radio and surfing the net. She hacks into the Earth Gate server where she spots the Bebop scheduled to land for vacation. She yells happily as if she knows about the Bebop, then a rock shower comes and tosses Edward and her equipment into the air. On the Bebop everyone is halfheartedly listening to a news program on TV; Jet prunes a Bonsai tree, Faye files her nails, and Spike washes his ship: the Swordfish II. The anchor explains that a 8 million Woolong bounty has been placed by the Earth government for whoever is responsible for causing an orbiting satellite to create these land carvings of animals. Spike decides to pass on the bounty opportunity, citing that chasing down hackers is boring work, which leaves Jet and Faye to team up alone much to Jet’s concern. Flying over a sector of Earth, Faye learns that there are hundreds of active transmitters in the area she’s searching for the hacker; at a defunct train depot Jet learns that the culprit is most likely Radical Edward, but he can’t get an accurate description of the person. Edward hacks into the Outernet server and enters the virtual mind of the satellite that started the land carvings, but once she is in there she learns that no one had gone in that caused the carvings. She hears a voice inside the system who identifies itself as the Central Processing Unit on the D135 Artificial Satellite. Edward decides to call it MPU because it’s like CPU, only neater. MPU explains that he made those land carvings to recreate the Nazca lines after the Gate Crash destroyed Earth’s landscape. The Earth police jam the signal and Edward loses contact with MPU. Edward contacts the Bebop and tells them that the satellite itself caused the land carvings at the cost of them granting her a favor. She explains that the only way to "capture" MPU is by flying manually to the satellite, avoiding the attack satellites that will open fire sensing on-board computers, and download MPU through a direct line into the system. Spike is excited about the challenge and flies off in his ship after the Bebop reaches exits Earth’s orbit. In his spacesuit, Spike connects port D7 to port 2, which allows him to fire lasers without the computer. With the computer and engine off, Spike drifts towards the satellite by opening and closing small airlocks that propel the ship back on course. Spike fires on the satellite but is blocked at the last moment by an attack satellite. The other satellites wake up and Spike is forced to turn his ship back on and race and dodge into incoming fire. Faye, flying in her Redtail, reluctantly covers Spike and engages the attack satellites who are firing in her direction. Edward suggests that Spike fly within 20 meters of MPU, where the attack satellites won’t risk hitting the weather satellite, while Faye acts as a decoy to draw fire. The plan works and Spike connects to the satellite where Edward goes to work downloading a copy of MPU. Back on Earth Spike and Jet attempt to collect their bounty but the Earth police rule that bounties are only issued to life forms and not computers. The crew attempts to fly off without Edward, who was promised by Faye that she could be a full member of the crew, and Edward crashes the ship using her remote control, forcing them to take her along. Spike complains that the three things he particularly hates (kids, animals and women with attitudes) are all packed gathered in his and Jet’s ship as they fly off from Earth where a new land carving (of Ed’s computer persona) is drawn onto the surface of South America. Memorable Quotes ---- is listening to a weather radio station while laying outside on some boulders. *'Weathergirl': District 38 is sunny. Slight rock showers this morning. Chance of rock showers into the afternoon—20 percent. District 39 is cloudy. Chance of rock showers this afternoon—10 percent. *'Edward': Bebop here here! Alright woo hoo! *'Weathergirl': Chance of rock showers today upgraded to 90 percent. *'Edward': Really. ---- Jet and Faye are discussing the new bounty opportunity. *'Spike': I’m gonna have to pass this time. *'Jet': You’re leaving me alone with her? *'Spike': Yeah what’s the problem? She’s all gun-ho about this thing, you know. *'Jet': I’m not the type to be led around by a woman. *'Spike': Then you’ll have to lead her around. *'Jet': I’m even less the type to do that. *'Faye': You know Jet, it’s easier to divide 8 million by two than by three—it’s a nice even number. *'Jet': Here we go. *'Faye': Wow, I’m really surprised. A tough guy like you afraid of hackers. *'Spike': Hackers are boring, and chasing them's more boring. *'Faye': Hackers are nerdy, pasty, tubby little geeks with triple-thick glasses; and this one is probably a demented Otaku with smelly feet, so catching him will be a breeze. ---- surfs the net in search of who caused the land carvings. *'Edward': Satellite from days of old, lead me to your access code! ---- and Jet talk in the ships cockpit. *'Spike': Jet, do you know that there are three things that I particularly hate? *'Jet': Really? defeated *'Spike': Kids, animals and women with attitudes. So tell me Jet, why do we have all three of them neatly gathered in our ship! yelling Songs Used *The Egg and I – Faye and Jet flying in their ships. Jet talking to Earthlings. (8 minutes 42 seconds) *??? – Edward talks to MPU. (12 minutes 30 seconds) *American Money – Big Shot segment. (21 minutes) Series Connections *Missed Bounty: This session is an example of the Bebop crew missing out on a bounty they set out to capture. They are unable to connect on the bounty of MPU, who was indeed responsible for the land carvings, on a technicality that only life forms be subject to bounties. Real World References *Jamming with Edward! – Is the title of an album recorded by several members of The Rolling Stones and released in 1972. The title refers to sessions pianist Nicky Hopkins, a talented studio player who has played with such groups as The Beatles, The Who, Neil Young, and Jeff Beck among others. *Uri Gellar – An Israeli-British performer and self-proclaimed psychic who alleges to be able to bend spoons with the power of his mind and have other psychic powers. The conspiracy theorist, Yuuri Kellerman, was influenced by Uri Geller at least in name.